sunday afternoons suck

So, while I'm trying to work through some narrative problems I've got I thought I'd better get the old fingers a-tapping with an update. Thats right, Not dead yet. Just fueled up on pent up rage and a really bad bottle of grappa someone once bought me as a joke. 

"Duke, " He said " This'll stop your drinking problem."

"Nat, this time you have actually lost what little mind you had?" I replied to the grinning fool " How's buying a man a bottle of booze going to help his drinking problem?"

"Well," Says he, taking a slug off of his bottle of Miller highlife" When you've drunk the cupboard almost dry at home on a tuesday night sitting alone in your darkened apartment, wearing just your pants.. When that happens and you look into what's been left till last, when you see this here cheap bottle of awful, awful booze, you'll see this and think 'Well thats me on the wagon because there's no Goddamn way I'm drinking that shit!"

Funny. I've had that bottle for about 5 years now.  I bring it out at parties to show to people and say 'When you see this bottles open its time to run for the hills.' It took Palin's nomination before I finally cranked it open and forced half the bottle down my protesting neck. When the world gone to complete shit in front of your eyes and you've already let it, that's the time to try anything to blot out what's left of the world.

Palin is dangerous. Palin is a publicity stunt. Palin is a clever move by a party with their backs up against the wall and they can hear the oncoming freight train that is the Obama campaign. 

Palin is their shot at gaining the McCain campaign some seriously needed publicity, she works for the party on so many levels.

1) being a woman they feel women can relate to her.

2) being a Hot woman they can appeal to the redneck bastards who've never looked a pretty woman in the eyes. 

Its turned the Presidential dog and pony show into a fashion parade. Guys have it easy when it comes to sartorial elegance. The most difficult question we have to ask ourselves is 'What colour tie do I need to wear today?'. In the coming months countless rainforests worth of paper are going to be wasted on her choice of shoes for Christs' sake. 

Her policies worry me as well. Lets not even talk about her poor daughter. Its a family issue and should have no bearing on anything. Have you tried to talk to teenagers recently? Its like they've just got off the boat from mars. Lets just be grateful the baby isn't already hooked on crack. 

They could have brought out a faceless no-body. A old man candidate, a grey suit who only the people in the know knew and we wouldn't have given a shit. Palin has injected vibrancy into a campaign that was bleeding momentum like jam out of a doughnut (I think the munchies have kicked in )

I'm not trying to say a woman shouldn't be VP or even President but seriously? Thats the best woman the republican party can find?  What kind of skeletons must the other serious female contenders have in their closets? 

Oh and if they win wait for Palin to go from MILF to WTF in about 6 nanoseconds. Look at photos of Blair just before he got in to just after he got in. He was a comparable age to Palin at the time. Something about politics at the highest level just sucks the vitality and fight out of you. Maybe its because you realise that when you're in charge you're not really in charge at all. There are a thousand people that put you in office and each one of them wants a piece of you. And when the shylocks have had their share of your soul there's not much left to take home at night. 

So thats why I'm here, because how ever fantastical my fiction, however fucked up and doomed I make the human race, we'll just find new real ways of making it worse for ourselves.